Harrison Ford expressed gratitude to his wife, Calista Flockhart, during an emotional speech at the Critics Choice Awards, acknowledging her support in a heartfelt manner.

Oh, brace yourselves for the riveting tale of how Harrison Ford, at the tender age of 81, was once again showered with adoration at the Critics Choice Awards. The world just couldn’t resist patting him on the back for his “action-packed legacy.” Cue the standing ovation, as if Ford hadn’t been receiving accolades since the invention of cinema. The man accepted his career achievement award, expressing profound happiness at witnessing the “talented people” in the industry—because, you know, it’s not like he’s been a part of shaping it for the past five decades.

As a token of gratitude, Ford acknowledged the pivotal role of luck (because talent clearly played a minor part) and praised the “wonderful writers, directors, and filmmakers” who apparently did all the heavy lifting. Oh, and let’s not forget the heartfelt appreciation for his “lovely wife, Calista Flockhart,” who graciously offers him “support.” Because being a Hollywood icon must be so emotionally taxing.

James Mangold, the herald of hyperbole, likened Ford to a “hypergiant star,” as if he were a celestial deity gracing us mortals with his presence. With a filmography that Mangold listed off like a litany, it’s a miracle Ford has time for anything other than basking in the glow of his own greatness.

And how could we overlook Ford’s recent stint in the Apple TV+ show Shrinking, a groundbreaking masterpiece that surely deserves all the awards? Oh, and there’s the Marvel debut on the horizon, because who doesn’t dream of seeing an octogenarian action hero in spandex?

In a shocking twist, Ford declared he won’t retire from acting, claiming he enjoys making movies more now than ever. Because, really, who wouldn’t want to endure the grueling world of showbiz for a moment longer? As if that weren’t enough, he also snagged a Palme d’Or for lifetime achievement, just to sprinkle a bit more stardust on his illustrious career. All hail Harrison Ford, the unretiring, hypergiant star of our cinematic dreams!